The new total knee replacement implant for the other leg was designed by Dr Fitzpatrick, Professor Gordon Blunn and Mr Jay Meswania of OrthoFitz Implants.
It is made of two parts which are linked together with a hinged mechanism so that the knee ligaments – which had all been shredded – would no longer be required and the knee could no longer dislocate.
The cat, named Missy, was hit by Megazord during a particularly violent skirmish with giant ninjas in downtown detroit last year. Missy was on a human organ donor list for ages, but they finally wrangled the high-tech prosthesis after assuring doctors she wouldn’t use it to knee children in the dark.
And this is why I should never write blogs at five in the morning.
Yes, Spirk is the slash pairing of James Tiberius Kirk, awesomebad Starfleet captain and all-round ladies man, and Spock, awesomebad Vulcan science officer, later ambassador to Romulus, practitioner of cowboy diplomacy and all-round nerve-pinching, mind-raping badass.
And Spirk has them bumming each other something fierce.
The whole thing began – or at least, took off properly – as a result of Pon Farr, which is a Vulcan hormonal need to bone or die. The Pon Farr episode in the original series is one of my favourites, and when I first saw it, in no way did I deduce bonerrific encounters from the scintillating plot and captivating character development taking place (having said that, I did deduce bonerrific encounters from the majority of The Little Mermaid, so… yeah). However there were stories springing up afterwards about Kirk and Spock stranded on some dustbowl planet GETTING THEIR SWEET TREKKY BONE ON.
Ahem.
If, inexplicably (or plicably, as the case may be) you hear the sound of rumbling ovaries/percolating man-gravy at the sight of these pictures, there are numerous… and I do mean numerous… sources on the net where fans have compiled, created, spawned and spewed reams of the stuff into sordid, wet little digital alleyways. Good luck with your perversions, you saucy little bastards; it’s a good thing none of this has affected me.
…I wonder how a Vulcan nerve pinch would affect a boner.
Forgive the misleading title, I just couldn’t resist.
Gizmo, hero of the Gremlin films, has been turned into a crazy-awesome skirt by New York based designers, Alex and Chloe. And as if having a gremlins head wrapped around your crotch with a dopey, benign smile on it’s tubby little face, consider this: if you happen to pick up someone wearing this bad boy, you would (if things went suitably in your favour) have to contend with peeling the face of a gremlin away from someone’s most intimate of regions. Which would either turn you off, or turn you on even more.
And if the latter is the case, you might need to consult a pharmacist.
Some genius has combined the subtle majesty of an imperial Tie Fighter, and the irrascable charm of Charlie Brown. It’s hard not to imagine Luke streaking down a narrow trench towards an exhaust port, with Charlie Brown’s enormous head zipping along after him. Where would Vader sit? In Charlie Brown’s mouth? I guess that makes sense; there isn’t a digestive tract attached, so it’s pretty safe to assume Darth couldn’t be accidentally broken down by stomach acids. Unless, of course, the Tie docks onto the rest of Charlies body, in which case…
I just went to a paint party with my steady. The whole thing was organized by The Taboo Group (very well, I might add), and the premise was very simple: organize a secret location, send out white bio-hazard suits, provide buttloads of paint, prompt the on-site DJ to crank it. We rocked up a bit before eight, were ushered through to the media lounge, downed some free beers and I proceeded to have a quiet freak-out at the prospect of being covered in paint. Eventually everyone was shunted into a massive plastic-coated warehouse area, and within minutes things got very slimy and very hectic. I’m not one for dancing, but I did attempt to re-enact Sam Rockwell’s money shot.
And I’d like to think I was moderately successful*.
Anyway, if they do throw another one, make sure you head along. The atmosphere was wonderful, and they actually drove a shit-box van into the dance floor area after about a half hour, and let people paint on it. I painted a large pink cock.
I’m not a simpleton, I swear.
Oh, also, my shower afterwards was very much like in the Voyage of the Dawn Treader, when Eustace was all like, oh noes, I’m a dagron! And Aslan was all like, I’m going to breathe on your manky wrist! And Eustace was all like, oh wow, my scales are coming off! And… you get the idea.
Jamie Bolton, clearly a shiny little genius, has utilized minimalist design aesthetics and principles to re-imagine movie posters for some classics. I particularly enjoyed his interpretations of the Back to the Future trilogy and The Shining, although I can’t help but feel his Jurassic Park poster ought to have had Jeff Goldblum’s oiled nipples staring outwards with glistening defiance.
Hello children! Yes, as you may have noticed, Nerds of a Feather got a wee bit of a rename under the auspices of Tom and Alex*. Today was the second episode of the new Nerds show, and I covered the following topics:
- I talked about the Book Book, a pretty sweet piece of gear for concealing and carrying your laptop about.
- We chatted about internet meme’s, and I endeavoured to present a contender for toppling Keyboard Cat. I failed.
- In Pokemon news, a real-life Pokemon index is being compiled, for real animals! I know, I know. It sounds awesome. But you can’t ‘deploy’ a marmoset without it trying to fuck your mobile phone. So… not really the same thing.
- The military has (sort of) invented a real-life Iron Man suit. I proposed that Tom and Alex join me in stomping on a shrunken Tokyo cityscape. Now to wait for the torrents of film offers to come rolling in.
- In gaming News, I gave my pre-release impressions of Star Trek Online beta, which incidentally finishes tomorrow! In case you’re wondering, I love it. Partly because a friend bought me a pre-order digital deluxe version for my birthday, but mostly because downing three cloaked warbirds with a photon spread before beaming down to a hidden Klingon outpost and blowing the shit out of it is totally boss.
Be sure to stay tuned for the podcast link, which should be up soon! Also, as usual, any feedback or thoughts on the segment can be posted on this blog entry. And I’d also like to add that it’s good to be back on The Somewhat Ambitious. Thanks for being so patient; you’re all terrific.
/Paul
*I’ve not used the word ‘auspices’ before. How did it sound? Was it out of context? I’m aware I could just google it, but I’m a lazy man. A sexy, lazy man.
Yes, I’m referring to Philip Michael Thomas of Miami Vice fame. I went through a bit of a vintage Miami Vice phase a year or so ago, but if you really want to delve into the deep, steamy heart of this shiny lothario, you need look no further than these two clips. Now, if someone asks if you know who Philip Michael Thomas is, you can say yes. And you’ll break down crying as a result.
Here is PMT acting his dick clean off in order to depict THE HORRORS OF DURGS.
And here is PMT singing his dick clean off in order to (inadvertently) depict THE HORRORS OF DUUURGS.
Paul Verhoeven (right) is on Triple J, as host of the Weekend Breakfast Show. He is a writer and film critic for Yen Magazine, and insists he is a regular columnist for Horse and Hound magazine (unverified). He recently finished a weekly series for The Vine called Curiageous where he answered people's burning questions and drank his own urine. He enjoys ducks.
Luke Ryan (left) is a stand-up comic, writer, and general man-about-town. He is a news blogger and feature writer for The Vine and also writes for the music blog Electrorash and the street mag ThreeThousand. In 2009 he performed at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival in his oh so descriptively titled show 'Luke's Got Cancer'. It was funnier than it sounds.
Both of them spend more of their time then they should perusing the Internet and gaming. The Somewhat Ambitious is essentially the product of this excess.
