The Somewhat Ambitious

You hear that? That weird rumbling noise?
IT’S THE SOUND OF BALLS RUMBLING WITH SWEET COMMERCE.
Yes, The Somewhat Ambitious is back. Somewhat. A post a day, at least; probably more, given my newfound lust for the bizarre. Here, incidentally, is what the deal is with Luke and I.
- Luke is travelling the world, and last thing [...]

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Long-term readers of The Somewhat Ambitious will know that, alongside North Korea, our other despotic regime of choice has always been the mighty Russia. I mean, what’s not to like? Brutal and bloody history, oppressive landscape and unlivable climate, plentiful concrete factories and open strip mines, and a fine line in the dourest/most alcoholic politicians [...]

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It’s starting to look like my obsession with Lovecraftian idiocy is catching on.
/Paul
(Link via Boing Boing)

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So. What the fuck are Peeps?
If you’re one of our American readers (or, as is entirely possible, you have a sugar addiction that nimbly transcends international borders), you’ll know of THE PEEP as a marshmallow treat. Initially pitched as an easter confection shaped as chicks, bunnies, and other animals, THE PEEP is one of those [...]

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Oh, hey there mouse, how you going? Me, I’m gre- HOLY SHIT YOU’RE FLYING. OH GOD. OH GOD. THE DAY HAS COME. THE GREAT MOUSE RECKONING IS HERE. QUICK, FEED THEM THE WOMEN AND CHILDREN FIRST. WE HAVE TO GET AWAYYYYYYYYYYY!
Was my first reaction to the news that scientists at NASA had succeeded in levitating [...]

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We know, we know. It’s been a long time coming.

Yes, Tramdalf has been shot. If you were having lunch in the Melbourne CBD yesterday, you may have seen a fairly epic commotion go down, and… well, I shan’t spoil the ending for you. Sufficed to say the footage is pretty hilarious, and you’ll be able [...]

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Can be heard echoing through the paragraphs of this particular delight from Rupert Murdoch’s news.com.au. Now while you’re reading, I want you to keep in mind that Rupey babes (oh God, I can’t believe I said that. Have you seen the man recently? He looks like someone has attached a toupee, googly eyes and glasses [...]

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So, you’ve bought your dream home. It’s huge. Like fucking huge. There’s bedrooms, master bedrooms, servant bedrooms, Presidential bedrooms and a dungeon. There’s decorative fountains, chandeliers and a super fun happy slide that goes all the way from the highest turret to the entrance hallway (oh yes, this dream house is also a fully fortified [...]

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When I first discovered Steve, Don’t Eat It back in the hazy mists of 2007 (hard to know where all the mist was coming from. Perhaps we had a carbon monoxide leak. That would explain why I only have around three memories from the entire year and two of them involved me trying to glue [...]

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I’ve only done this once before, so bear with me.
I just woke up from a dream. It began (I think) with a guy on Twitter (ash something, if I recall) writing a hugely inflammatory blog post about my top ten films of all time list. You see, it turns out Michael Gambon was running a [...]

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