One of the oft-cited glories of the internet has been the way in which it has unshackled the latent creativity that exists within all of us. Everywhere you go online, more and more people are finding inventive new ways of sharing and creating media, whether it be humourous Youtube videos, imaginative writing or beautiful music. Hell, even the handicrafts are getting on the action, and a site like Etsy allows people all over the world to produce something real and then sell it in the largest craft marke- OH SWEET JESUS WHAT IS THAT?
Yes, that is indeed a stuffed fish’s head coming out of a stuffed squirrel’s body. Taxidermy: the new kings of the mash-up. But wait a second… is that, is that blood on its side? Ah yes, artfully placed blood stains, the mark of a true professional. And this lovingly hand-crafted conversation piece/six inches of pure terror can be yours for the low, low price of $US350. But wait, there’s more:

A celebration of all that is wonderful about the mysterious world of man-pigeon hybrid hot air balloon love, this stunningly rendered piece is sure to spice up even the most banal of walls. Yours for merely $US95. And finally:

We have… um… a teddy bear with a vagina gaping out of its stomach. I, uh, don’t really like to spend too much time thinking about the target market for this product. $US35. Bargain. I guess.
Whew. I think I need a lie down.
/Luke
[all these and more can be found at the excellent Regretsy, an astonishing collection of all that is cryptic and concerning about the international handicrafts movement. I knew we couldn't trust them]


12 responses so far ↓
1 felise // Oct 12, 2009 at 7:55 pm
fishsquirrel is going to give me nightmares for weeks to come.
2 jilske // Oct 12, 2009 at 8:17 pm
Somehow I would’ve expected the teddy bear to have a dick…ah well, win some lose some.
Interestingly though, it made me think of care bears (only a small step from dicks to rainbows right). Then I got nostalgic and google-imaged ’sunny bear’. Unfortunately I got this instead. Sunny bear vs Sunshine bear, noooooo, my eyes, my innocent eyes!!!
3 miss gilly // Oct 12, 2009 at 9:40 pm
wow, and they’re not even the creepiest ones.
the hand crafted vajayjay ‘replica’ charms take the cake.
you have to admire the effort that’s gone into creating the mutant fish squirrel though… ok maybe you don’t.
4 Paul // Oct 13, 2009 at 8:45 am
I cannot adequately describe how badly skewed my dreams were last night, probably on account of that goddamn squirrel fish monstrosity.
5 Kia // Oct 13, 2009 at 10:57 am
Would a splice between a fisy and a squirrel be called a squishy or a firrel?
6 Rach // Oct 13, 2009 at 11:18 am
What I want to know is why vagina-bear has a Texans stamp on her foot. Honestly, is this where sex toys, furries and redneck sports supporters have found common ground?
7 luke // Oct 13, 2009 at 11:23 am
texas: the gritty underside of america’s dirt-encrusted boot
8 Taylor // Oct 13, 2009 at 11:54 am
Luke, I don’t think I could have said it better myself!
9 Aqualec // Oct 13, 2009 at 11:55 am
I actually went to school with someone who fucked his teddy bear all through year 12. It was “practice” for the after party at our end of year formal.
10 Tash // Oct 13, 2009 at 12:06 pm
wow… that’s the second link i’ve seen today for a teddy bear with a vagina…
i’m wondering if this is some sort of sign… for what i have absolutely no idea…
11 Anthony // Oct 14, 2009 at 9:30 am
I thought the fish/squirrel looked pretty cool… I’d get one if it was cheaper
12 beckoning_ // Oct 14, 2009 at 9:21 pm
I hope they make a movie adaptation of the fish/squirrel. Maybe the man-pigeon can have a supporting role. Set in Paris of course…
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