The Somewhat Ambitious

Now, I like to think I am never, ever, ever at any time ever prone to hyperbole, so you can trust me when I say that this blog post will in all likelihood change everything you thought you knew about the world.

When you were young, everybody basically dreamed of having the same four things when they grew up: a personal space rocket, a palace/castle/chateau made from solid gold, a personal helper chimp and a car that could be driven on water. Well I’m here to tell you that the last of those things actually, truly exists. Say hello to the Amphicar. Yes, that is a car being driven down a river. But wait, those fellows look positively aged. What are they doing in such a hip new piece of technology? What? This thing was created back in 1963? How in God’s name have I been ignorant of such a miracle until this afternoon? A horrible brain injury from the time I tried to base jump using a set of home-made duck wings? But… that’s impossible. I hate ducks. Who are you? Don’t touch me! You’re not a real doctor! In fact I don’t think you even really exist. God knows you haven’t responded to a single one of my questions so far.

No, wait, don’t leave…

The Amphicar! Apparently these bad boys started production in 1963 with the anticipation that soon 20 000 Amphicars would be sold per year. The company ceased production in 1965 and only 3878 Amphicars were ever produced. Which raises the question, how could people actually resist a car that could DRIVE ON THE FUCKING WATER?! Well, it seems that it wasn’t necessarily great at performing either of its primary functions. As one owner has said ” We like to think of it as the fastest car on the water and fastest boat on the road”. High praise indeed. Nonetheless the Amphicar has crossed the English Channel and most of the ones produced back in the early 60s are still in operation. Which either speaks to their profound durability or to the nigh on insane dedication of the early adopters who picked up one of the originals. Given the existence of a number of ’swim-ins’ (Amphicar meet ups), I’d tend toward the latter. Check out this video and see if your inner child doesn’t just go straight ahead and blow a load. Chubsy-wubsy style:

And just to finish up, here’s a photo of a man in a sailor’s hat driving an Amphicar down the Grand Canal in Venice. Arsey bastard.

Although I’d say the only fitting way for that particular joy ride to finish up would be for it to be wiped out by a squad of commandos riding around in a FUCKING HUMDINGA!

Yeah. That’s right. Watch yourself ocean. Watch yourself river. Watch yourself aquarium. Cars are coming for you. Next up, we’re going to do a hit’n'run on a beluga.

So… Uh, everybody else is this excited by floating cars, right?

[via Eternally Cool]

/Luke