The Somewhat Ambitious

Tim and Eric.

Apart from being one of the best things on television, Tim and Eric Awesome Show Great Job stars one of the most terminally brilliant F-grade celebrities of all time, David Liebe Hart. For those of you unfamiliar with Hart, he ran a show on LA public access television, entitled The Junior Christian Science Bible Lesson Show. You’d think that given the nature of Tim and Eric, the guy is a comic genius and that in no way does he take his performances seriously. At least, not seriously enough to dedicate years to his puppet shows, irony free, in the form of a christian puppet show.

You’d be wrong.

Not only is the dancing blonde vomit-inducingly reminiscent of the woman dancing on Dennis Hoppers car in Blue Velvet before he rapes young Jeffrey Beaumont, but there appears to be an old Jewish ghost in a fez in the room. Somehow, Hart manages to convey both indifference and contempt towards this huge velure-clad bitch with naught but a hugely racist puppet, and a panda that sings. Well, to be fair, all his creations sing and talk. In the exact same voice. How could this get any more awesome, you may ask? Observe.

Whilst I do love christmas (much to the chargin of Luke, who despises both consumerism and tinsel with an almost Leninesque fervour), at no point did I need the point driven home so hard. If you watched carefully, you’ll notice that at the end of his song, Bob (the guy who sodomised his guitar with the christmas song in question) realised Hart HAD GONE TO THE BATHROOM AND WASN’T READY TO PERFORM YET. The Phish groupie on the left mutters something from deep within a pot-addled haze, the blonde appears to twitch a bit, and Bob starts delivering a message of goodwill. If this isn’t the greatest thing on the internet, I don’t know what is.

You may now be wondering what else Hart has done. Well, I did a little digging, and you want to know what his most prominent TV role has been?

HE WAS ON GOLDEN GIRLS.

Fuck. I have nothing to say which can top that.

/Paul