What ho! Be that an Orcish outpost you see before you? Nay, it cannot be. The Orcs have no mastery of balsa wood. Or high-grade electronics. Obvious give aways really. What it is, then, is the Wow Pod, a stroke of genius/insanity/just a stroke from a group at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (it’s never specified whether they’re students or teachers). In their words, the WoW Pod is:
an immersive architectural solution for the advanced WoW (World of Warcraft) player that provides and anticipates all life needs
These needs are, quite literally, food, water, shelter and a place to defecate. The WoW Pod comes equipped with a screen, a ‘throne’ (yes sir, you are certainly a king of the world when your gaming duties require the construction of a purpose-built teepee), a stove with ready to cook food arrayed above it (with names such as “Crunchy Spider Surprise” and “Beer Basted Ribs”. Just like in the game! Geddit?), a tap for hydration, and the piece de resistance, a toilet hidden underneath the seat of the throne. So now you can spam Wrath with one hand, while wiping your ass with the other. The future is now.
Note the ‘Orc architectural detailing’. Mmmm. Authentic. Apparently there are no current plans for commercial production of the WoW Pod. Why? BECAUSE THE ENTIRE IDEA IS FUCKING LUDICROUS AND FRANKLY TERRIFYING. GO TO ANOTHER ROOM TO SHIT! I MEAN IT! I DON’T CARE HOW DEEP IN THE BOWELS OF NAXXRAMAS YOU ARE, EVERYONE JUST HAVE A BREATHER AND WAIT FOR THEM TO COME BACK! IT’S DEFECATION PEOPLE! CERTAIN STANDARDS MUST BE MAINTAINED!
Whew. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off for a blog bog.
/Luke
5 responses so far ↓
1 Beaudacious // May 11, 2009 at 9:43 pm
Is it lame that after reading this in the Herald, the first thing I did was turn to TSA to see if they’d picked up on it yet?
2 beckoning_ // May 11, 2009 at 9:43 pm
I enjoy your use of capital letters.
3 luke // May 12, 2009 at 8:48 am
@Beaudacious: you know us too well.
@beckoning_: ME TOO!
4 Kia // May 12, 2009 at 5:01 pm
I want one! I want to see if I can set some sort of record of how many generations of sims I can “biologically” have in one continuous 24 hour sitting… BTW, now I’m craving ribs for dinner…
5 Nerds of a Feather Wrap-up, Tuesday May 19th! // May 19, 2009 at 9:14 am
[...] – We discussed the Wowpod, which Luke covered in much more detail (and with much more anger, and arousal on his part) here! [...]
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